Death a contemplation-3rd

This is the third post in the series. Kindly read the first two at the following links:

Death-a contemplation-1st

Death-a Contemplation-2nd

Why there is so much darkness here around everything? We, in spite of our desperate efforts to understand something of this process life, are just having huge numbers of opinions…of which we are sure of nothing. If life is for living for a purpose then why there is death? What is the purpose? Most of it… why this mystery is still unsolved? Why so much darkness? It seems that with our untiring efforts, we should have it solved if and only if someone is not putting the great efforts to hide the truth from us. Could that be our God? If not he then who is it? Or if in our present state of mind/consciousness it is not possible for us to conceive this mystery?

What are we and why we are? Am I just a collection of memories or my being, my persona…character is my reality?

I see someone assaulting the dignity of a girl in the lone street…if I have to save the girl; how the things will behave? Let’s see…I’ll try to save her and by doing this I’ll BECOME a Brave person or things actually are reverse…I’ll try to save her only because I am a BRAVE person. My brave nature will prompt me to act. My action will follow my nature…my innate nature will direct the flow of my actions, my action comes out of ME…they are just ME. It is not that- I AM what I DO…but I DO what I AM.

Second, in my bid to save her…whether I’ll first filter my memories to find out if I have done this before also? And if I hadn’t…I’ll not venture further into it or if I had done it earlier also then I’ll be happy to take the affair into my hands. But, in reality nothing of this sort happens…we never filter ourselves for action (but only for results)…because our actions are nothing…they are just demonstrations of ourselves…physical pronunciations of ourselves…our inner self…of what I am. Memories are irrelevant…even if I forget all my memories of bravery…but when facing a similar situation I’ll do the same action again…same type of memory is created…I’ll save the girl again. Memories don’t create me…I am the creator. Source matters not the extensions. So in order to be as it is as I am now…I don’t need any of my past memories. Erase all my memories and I’ll still remain. At the most I’ll lose the data…data regarding my parents, my love, friends…but processer is something else and it always remains.

So I save the girl and a memory is created in me…it is also created in that girl and culprit according to state of their mind. All of my memories reflect the different attributes of my being or my persona. Like my kindness if I donate, my being a true friend if I feel the pain of my friend. So different persons have different memories for one particular common event as all have different personas.

In nutshell, I will be the same person without my memories as my memories are direct outcomes of what I am. My past memories can’t affect my now time decision as they were created according to my state of being at that particular time and if I am a different person now then I’ll behave differently and so a different memory will be created.

That’s what death is. We die but we only loose our memories…nothing else. My persona, my being survives and we carry it as it is to our next life. Our journey of life never ends…we always start from where we left in our last attempt. We never start it from scratch as there is no logic in it. Life must be a phenomenon moving in circles; because when we take birth…can we say that that point was the beginning of ours? Can something emerge from nothing? Can it be possible that at one point there was nothing and the very next point we emerge? It happened only once when something emerged from nothing and that was our God…or the Beginning (My head bursts when I try to comprehend it).

Just look at your childhood…you can see that there are certain attributes of your character like bravery, kindness, fear, religiousness, music etc which you haven’t acquired in this life…these were part of you since your childhood…you were born with them…they just unveiled as you grow. You and your siblings are part of the same family…raised in same enviourment…but yet you are all very different by nature, have different views, aspirations…why? Because you are all just continuing your journey from where you left in your last life.

I remember something of my life…from early childhood days when I was around 5-6, I had a very strange liking for music…I still remember the strange feelings which I felt while listening to some songs played on radio which my father used to play…I felt very strange feelings of peace and mystery while listening to those songs. My love for music went on rising and I was enjoying music all the day while studying, doing gym, jogging, roaming…It was music everywhere. Then around age 23…i told one of my relative who was in music field that I wanted to learn music. He only laughed at me. I bought one small keyboard and my Aunt (Bua Ji) played for me the music of one song…I went on playing it for days…and all of a sudden I started playing some new tunes by myself…after that there was no looking back…I played very difficult compositions on my own…I even created some tunes on my own…now I can play any song that too without any formal training. I am sure that somewhere it has linked with my past life. Music must have been a very important part of my past life.

We grow as a person in our life…evolve, improve, change and then die…born again…and the evolvement process starts again. We never cease to exist. Lord Krishna has used the words “Marandharma” for Arjuna and “Mrityuloka” for earth in Geeta. Death is implied in our world…it is a part of being in here. If we extend the words of Lord…then there is no death for those living in other “Lokas”…these lokas may be those who are above earth (Material World) in hierarchy.

But we never go empty handed from here…Alexandra was wrong when near his death, he ordered to show his empty hands out of his coffin while going to graveyard to convey the message that even after having such a vast wealth accumulated by killing; he was going away empty. But he never went empty handed…before death he learnt the shallowness of wealth…he witnessed the bigger picture of life. He evolved in that life journey. We never come here empty handed nor we’ll go empty handed. Life is very generous…it makes sure to enrich us.

I don’t feel that our memories are stored in our physical brain because if they get stored in the brain, then with it our memories become a part of our physical existence. But our brain gets vanished, when we die…and so logically with the destruction of our brain, all our memories must also get destroyed. But literally all of our Rishis/Gurus say that they remember their past lives. However if our memories are physical phenomenon, then how our Gurus can claim that they remember their past lives? We have seen so many real life examples. Are our memories got stored in our soul?

But we all know scientifically that whenever someone gets his brain damaged accidentally, then he faces severe problems in recalling the past memories. So where really our memories are stored? And what should we take of the claims of our Gurus? But they don’t need to lie. So is there exists some sort of “cosmic memory” where all incidents are got stored and anyone can recall them after getting an access to this “cosmic memory”. I can’t say about it but I feel when we die…our memories start to fade out just like our dreams…when we wake up in the early morning…we can recall most part of our dream…but slowly into the day…we forget most of it. So when someone dies…for some time he remembers everything and if his attachments and unfulfilled desires are not strong then he starts to forget everything and moves out to start a new journey. But some with strong willpower can stay for long…we call them ghosts.

Here I remember something very important…some 10 years back…someone asked me how we change…transform. How a trembling person becomes a brave warrior? Like Angulimaal changed when he encountered Mahatma Buddha…from a ruthless killer he became a saint and preached Buddhism and Peace after that. At that time I couldn’t answer him…I myself didn’t have any experience in that. But life taught me some of the hardest lessons during this passage, mostly with a slap. We change, transform when we conceive, absorb, comprehend the truth in its purest form…wisdom, knowledge or Gyan transforms us. Like i am a big foodie…who can’t control his urge/greed for tasty food…so here I am always with full mouth, fatty, weak and ill. And then one day I think; I have eaten so much of tasty foods in my life till now…but where is that taste…that feeling now…it is nowhere in me, my mouth. And then cometh the realization that taste is illusion…unquenchable…and I find my greed for food falling. This is wisdom. Most of our fears are because of fear of death. One day someone like Lord Krishna comes to us and bring our soul out of our bodies…we see our bodies laying lifeless and realize that we are something more than bodies and we see our fears, timidness, jealousy, greed going away…we are transforming.

We are also on our journey…journey to the unknown. But see our children…our young people…they are not happy…although they are living…because someone else (parents) is choosing the aim of their lives…so they are confused…they are misrouted…as they are doing things which they never liked in their previous attempt. That was why astrology was invented; to know the journey of the child…to know what he can do best for him to feel greatest happiness.

Buddha saw an old man dying and he in one moment felt the impermanence of worldly matters or things…and so with that all wealth…most beautiful women, tasty food became useless for him and he left everything to start his journey towards reality…permanence.

We also know his story; we daily see people dying…but we never feel like Buddha…why???

Because he started where he left in his last birth. And we left our journey somewhere else…